This piece explores the evolving relationship between the Nigerian diaspora and their homeland through personal narrative and interviews. The author reflects on declining a Facebook friend request from a cousin in Nigeria, which triggered deeper questions about obligation and responsibility. Growing up watching parents make significant financial sacrifices through remittances and material support for family "back home," the author examines their own disconnection from these practices.

The text contextualizes this personal experience within broader patterns: Nigeria receives approximately $24 billion in remittances annually, with the African diaspora considered the "6th region of Africa" by the African Union for its economic impact. Through interviews with three generations of Nigerian-Americans—the "Fairy Godmother," the "Afropolitan," and the "Detty December Warrior"—the author reveals a generational shift away from unconditional financial support toward more selective, empowerment-focused engagement. This evolution reflects both pragmatism about Nigeria's challenges and a desire to redefine diaspora relationships beyond obligation, seeking more balanced, collaborative connections between generations and countries.